Where have I been?!?!

It feels like an eternity since I’ve shared a piece of my world here. A lot has transpired in the past month, a whirlwind of emotions and experiences that have shaped my perspective.

The excitement of planning my workshop on Fat Liberation, Pleasure, and Kink was palpable. It was a dream come true, a chance to create a safe space for individuals to explore their sexuality without judgment. However, the rug was pulled out from under me when the venue unexpectedly denied our request. The rejection felt like a personal attack, questioning my worth and the importance of the work I do.

Amidst the disappointment, my husband’s unwavering support became a lifeline. He encouraged me to take a much-needed break, a vacation to recharge and refocus. Initially, I resisted, fearing neglect of my business, but the allure of escape eventually won.

The salty breeze and rhythmic waves were therapeutic. As I walked along the shore, I began to process the emotional turmoil. The vacation wasn’t just about relaxation; it was a journey of self-discovery. I realized the importance of prioritizing my mental health and setting boundaries.

Returning home, I’m determined to rebuild and redefine my path. I’m exploring new avenues, forging new connections, and staying true to my mission. It won’t be easy, but with each step, I’m gaining strength and resilience.

To regain momentum, I focused on strengthening my online presence. This included writing product reviews, promoting my burlesque involvement in my local community and being part of Sex Down South, and sharing inspiring content. As I engaged with the community, I began to question my long-term goals and the direction of my business.

A pivotal moment came when I shared my desire for a mentor who could guide me through overcoming internalized fatphobia and embracing pleasure. A friend’s simple response, “Why not you?” was a wake-up call. It ignited a realization: there’s a genuine need for someone like me in this space.

I’m passionate about empowering Fat Femmes to embrace their bodies, explore their sexuality, and find joy. With the support of incredible mentors, I’ve gained the knowledge and skills to guide others on this journey. It’s challenging work, but the potential to create positive change is incredibly rewarding. I’m committed to sharing my experiences and inspiring others to take those first steps towards self-love and pleasure.

I am also excited to share some recent highlights! Performing as a burlesque kitten at Sid’s Gold was an incredible experience. Rebuilding my dance confidence has been a journey, and I’m thrilled to be taking the stage again this fall.

I’m honored to be returning as Dungeon Director for The Labyrinth at the Sex Down South Conference. Creating a safe, inclusive space for exploration is a passion of mine. I’ve also been invited to teach my workshop, “Honoring the Fat, Loving, Sensual Body and Treating it like a Temple,” once again. I’m excited to share new insights and tools with attendees. Use the code MSK24 for a discount! Just use the code when you go to www.SexDownSouth.Com and click on buy ticket. You can put the code in the discount box.

Beyond these professional milestones, I’ve made significant strides in my personal well-being. With the support of a fantastic healthcare team, I’ve been focusing on mental health and self-care.

To wrap up, I’m thrilled to announce my involvement in Betty Vou Plait’s burlesque show, ‘Sugar N the Candy Kingdom,’ as the Bubblegum guard. It’s a fantastic opportunity to support a fellow artist and be part of such a creative project. Here is the link to grab your tickets: https://bettyvouplait.ticketspice.com/sugar-n-the-candy-kingdom.

Additionally, I’m excited to share that I’ll be a Starship Ambassador, providing reviews of products for Fat Femmes. Use the code MSK2024 for a discount!

I’m truly grateful for the opportunities to grow and connect with my community. Let’s celebrate body neutrality, being Fat Femmes, enjoying and receiving pleasure, and empowerment together!

When your self-care looks different from other’s self-care

  Self-care can look different for everyone. For some, it could be a mini-vacation or spa day. Others could be a walk in the park or reading a novel at your favorite spot.  For example,  my husband is cleaning the house and wants to keep it clean. He explained that this keeps his anxiety down and his mental self intact. I know this is a struggle for him since he has been taking on more as the provider in our household. This brings him peace and insight into what he needs to care for around the house and himself. It also means taking my meds and getting the rest I need, especially on bad pain days in which I can not do a lot of housework. This past week with the change in weather and doing a lot of driving for my side gig, which doesn’t help, I felt like shit when I woke up that next day. I didn’t have a lot of energy and realized I should have slept in. When I mentioned this, my husband told me to return to bed. I said I couldn’t because I had a lot of things to work on and around the house. His reply to what I said is something I haven’t heard from him; you can be lazy and still productive. If your body is tired, rest and my to-do list can wait. He also added that I can’t be productive either if I am tired and don’t take care of myself. So I took my ass back to bed and slept for another 4 to 5 hours. I woke up and found his text saying that lunch was in the fridge, and he was out with kiddo at the park. This reminds us that we need some self-care and make time for it, or else we can’t be there for our family and friends.

      Self-care is whatever makes you happy and comfortable. It is the energy you can put into taking care of yourself. It makes you feel recharged and able to do what you need to do. It can be as simple as paying bills or taking a long bath with your favorite bubble bath or bath bomb. Dancing in your living room to a song from your teens or a kid show your kids watch. (Don’t judge me; Yo Gabba Gabba was a bomb to watch when my daughter was younger.). It can be as simple as making a small breakfast so you will not feel bad later in the day. Each of these things can bring you joy and that you are taking care of yourself. If it does not have to be expensive, outlandish, or doesn’t satisfy your soul. You are more than that.

      So please take time for self-care and remind your loved ones to do the same. Again it doesn’t have to be what you see on TV or what you see your favorite artist or actor doing as a method of self-care. Self-care is all about you. So take care of yourself and then take care of the rest.

And a reminder that I hope you live a delicious life of love, new adventures and that I am proud of you!

P.S. I would love to hear what you do for yourself as a form of self-care or what you want to try. I can’t wait to see what you have to say!

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