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How Fat Liberation is tied to Fat Pleasure

You may asked why I am talking about Fat Liberation and Pleasure. It seems that two do not go together and are taboo at best. I say the two are intertwined and you can not have Liberation without Pleasure. Here are some questions and answers on the topic below to give you some insight on my argument.

Why is Pleasure so important to Fat Liberation

When you think of Fat Liberation, many referred to Fat Liberation Manifesto Written by Judy FreeSpirit back in 1973. This was very important at this time and the focus of Fat Liberation which was happening at the same time as the Sexual Revolution. Unfortunately neither movement mentions that a Fat Person deserves pleasure as any other person who isn’t fat.

So Why didn’t the Sex and Fat movement acknowledged that Fat Folx Deserve Sex Pleasure

As Sydelle Barreto mentioned in her 2023 Thesis titled,” Fat and Forgotten: The Exclusion of Fat Women in Sexual Liberation and the Implications for Sexual Public Health states in the Abstract Thesis, “that sexual liberation movement hasn’t fully grappled with the impact of fatphobia. At the same time, the fat liberation movement, which albeit occasionally has addressed issues of fetishization, has not fully come to terms with the sexual liberation as a necessary “frontier” of freedom within the fat liberation movement. “

So why bring this up now?!?

I bring this up because I had and witnessed my pleasure and the right to pleasure dismissed by doctors, therapists, Fellow Fat Folx, the media and General public. This means that they do not have access to Proper Sex education, to Pleasure Products, and being a sensual and Sexual being in itself. This has also happened to other Fat Folx, especially Fat Femmes who have had it questioned by others to why they are seeking pleasure.

So how do we begin to tackle this issue and why it is so important to connect Fat Liberation to Pleasure

There are many ways to teach and incorporate Pleasure into our Fat Liberation. First we need to acknowledge that We as Fat folx are sexual and sensual beings. That being said, we must also acknowledge that may be some trauma that needs to be address and that it will take time to heal from SA that Fat Folx may have encountered. Those who are sex educators, coaches, workers and therapists need to look at our own fatphobia and bias against Fat Folx and how it has prevented Fat Folx from seeking their help on unlearning negative views on sex, pleasure and that they have a right to these resources.

And that is the tip of the iceberg. Things like proper sex education, making accommodations for Fat Folx to attend events, TEACHING Body neutrality, Supporting Folx who do the work like me and supporting a Fat Folx in your life who wants to include Pleasure in the PURSUIT of Fat Liberation.

I do not know everything, but I hope I gave you something to marinate on, see if you can look for other fat Liberators who believe that we too deserve pleasure, and change any misconceptions when it comes to their own Bias toward Fat Folx and FatPhobia.

I hope this has HELPED you understand us Fat Folx and the work I do. If you would like to continue to support my work you can do the following:

1.) Like and share this post

2.) Set up a 20-MINUTE Discovery call to see if we mesh and how I can help you.

3.) Attend my workshop, “Honoring the FAT-LOVING SENSUAL BODY and Treating it like a Temple”. This will be offered on July 20th. Information and ticket information is located in this link: https://forbiddentickets.com/events/msk/2024-07-20-honoring-the-fat-loving-sensual-body-and-treating-it-like-a-temple

I will also be teaching this at Sex Down South in September. You can use the discount code, “MSK24” for $65 off your conference fee when you go to http://www.sexdownsouth.com

4.) Or you can do a love offering to MY Venmo account, Diva Princple, as a gift to continue my work.

And remember to stay safe, hydrate, live a deliciously life, and stay Pervy!

Love,

MsK

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**Honoring the Fat, Loving, Sensual Body and treating it like a temple! **

I am offering a workshop that focuses on self-care, learning tools to quiet the critic inside of you, treating your body as a temple, and giving those who identify as Fat and Femme a safe place to explore their sensuality and to be sexy beings. Here is a description of what to expect below and what I will be teaching:

As Fat people, we deal with external and internal fatphobia that does not allow us to see that our bodies are not sacred or sensual and should be honored. Each Fat Femme(means anyone who identifies as female. Whether you are born female, Trans, butch, stud, Or non-binary. And race has nothing to do with being femme either) person, we deserve, yearn for, and needs a space to start that journey into honoring our bodies. Through this workshop, MsK will help each participant to ask themselves to let go and give themselves some graces for being Fat, self-care tools to care for themselves, develop affirmations to set the tone of honoring their Fat bodies, small movement to open up their body to feel more sensual vibe and to treat their beautiful fat body as a sacred temple.

A workshop led by MsK for those who identify as Fat and Femme to treat themselves better and like a temple. We will go over the following items during this workshop:

  • What does self-care look like for you
  • Tools to help with intrusive thoughts with some tools you can use
  • That our bodies are as sacred and sensual as anyone else and are temples
  • To learn different techniques on how to start your journey in being more present and
    treating it as a temple
  • How to sense your body’s needs and listen to it
  • That being Sensual is not a race and just be you!
  • Sex. What is it, how does it affect you as a Fat Femme and what steps in how to accept being a sexy being
  • And to give yourself some grace!!!!

There will be refreshments, goodie bags and a short fashion show at this event. You can purchase tickets thru this website: https://forbiddentickets.com/events/msk/2024-03-24-honoring-the-fat-loving-sensual-body-and-treating-it-like-a-temple. Tickets are $35 plus service fees.

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Latest Toy review sponsored by Starship

This post may contain affiliate links. Affiliate links allow Deliciously Perverted to earn commissions on products we recommend. All opinions are our own.

The Trio is a versatile, handheld toy that combines suction, vibration, and thrusting functions. Its compact size and easy-to-use controls make it a user-friendly option. The suction is powerful and satisfying, while the vibration offers customizable pleasure.

I initially found the thrusting feature underwhelming, but after a break, I discovered it provided additional stimulation. It’s important to note that individual experiences may vary.

Key features:

  • Three-in-one functionality: suction, vibration, and thrusting
  • Ten adjustable speeds for each function
  • Splashproof and easy to clean
  • Comfortable design for solo or partnered use

Overall, The Trio is a solid addition to any pleasure collection. The powerful suction and customizable vibration modes make it a standout performer. While the thrusting function might not be a game-changer for everyone, it’s a nice added bonus.

So for Fat Femmes who want to find something that will make your clit happy, then this is the toy for you. The thrusting and vibrating is an added bonus. Plus it does not make your hands numb either. So if you need a new pulsing toy, the Trio is for you. And as always you can use my code, MSK2024 to get a discount on any of your purchases. So remember, live a delicious life and stay pervy!

Where have I been?!?!

It feels like an eternity since I’ve shared a piece of my world here. A lot has transpired in the past month, a whirlwind of emotions and experiences that have shaped my perspective.

The excitement of planning my workshop on Fat Liberation, Pleasure, and Kink was palpable. It was a dream come true, a chance to create a safe space for individuals to explore their sexuality without judgment. However, the rug was pulled out from under me when the venue unexpectedly denied our request. The rejection felt like a personal attack, questioning my worth and the importance of the work I do.

Amidst the disappointment, my husband’s unwavering support became a lifeline. He encouraged me to take a much-needed break, a vacation to recharge and refocus. Initially, I resisted, fearing neglect of my business, but the allure of escape eventually won.

The salty breeze and rhythmic waves were therapeutic. As I walked along the shore, I began to process the emotional turmoil. The vacation wasn’t just about relaxation; it was a journey of self-discovery. I realized the importance of prioritizing my mental health and setting boundaries.

Returning home, I’m determined to rebuild and redefine my path. I’m exploring new avenues, forging new connections, and staying true to my mission. It won’t be easy, but with each step, I’m gaining strength and resilience.

To regain momentum, I focused on strengthening my online presence. This included writing product reviews, promoting my burlesque involvement in my local community and being part of Sex Down South, and sharing inspiring content. As I engaged with the community, I began to question my long-term goals and the direction of my business.

A pivotal moment came when I shared my desire for a mentor who could guide me through overcoming internalized fatphobia and embracing pleasure. A friend’s simple response, “Why not you?” was a wake-up call. It ignited a realization: there’s a genuine need for someone like me in this space.

I’m passionate about empowering Fat Femmes to embrace their bodies, explore their sexuality, and find joy. With the support of incredible mentors, I’ve gained the knowledge and skills to guide others on this journey. It’s challenging work, but the potential to create positive change is incredibly rewarding. I’m committed to sharing my experiences and inspiring others to take those first steps towards self-love and pleasure.

I am also excited to share some recent highlights! Performing as a burlesque kitten at Sid’s Gold was an incredible experience. Rebuilding my dance confidence has been a journey, and I’m thrilled to be taking the stage again this fall.

I’m honored to be returning as Dungeon Director for The Labyrinth at the Sex Down South Conference. Creating a safe, inclusive space for exploration is a passion of mine. I’ve also been invited to teach my workshop, “Honoring the Fat, Loving, Sensual Body and Treating it like a Temple,” once again. I’m excited to share new insights and tools with attendees. Use the code MSK24 for a discount! Just use the code when you go to www.SexDownSouth.Com and click on buy ticket. You can put the code in the discount box.

Beyond these professional milestones, I’ve made significant strides in my personal well-being. With the support of a fantastic healthcare team, I’ve been focusing on mental health and self-care.

To wrap up, I’m thrilled to announce my involvement in Betty Vou Plait’s burlesque show, ‘Sugar N the Candy Kingdom,’ as the Bubblegum guard. It’s a fantastic opportunity to support a fellow artist and be part of such a creative project. Here is the link to grab your tickets: https://bettyvouplait.ticketspice.com/sugar-n-the-candy-kingdom.

Additionally, I’m excited to share that I’ll be a Starship Ambassador, providing reviews of products for Fat Femmes. Use the code MSK2024 for a discount!

I’m truly grateful for the opportunities to grow and connect with my community. Let’s celebrate body neutrality, being Fat Femmes, enjoying and receiving pleasure, and empowerment together!

Confessions of using my first Clit suction toy

This post may contain affiliate links. Affiliate links allow Deliciously Perverted to earn commissions on products we recommend. All opinions are our own.

Hi Folx! It’s your friendly neighborhood sex and body acceptance coach, MsK and I have a confession to make. I have never used a clit suction toy in my life. To be honest I was kind of scared to try one since I didn’t know if I would like it or not. However, Starship, www.starship.com, who is sponsoring this review, decided to send me the Calypso to see what the fuss is all about. And as you know they are a well-known Sex Health and Wellness company which is located in Georgia with 8 locations around the Atlanta area and one location in East Tennessee in East Ridge. They offer discreet packing, free shipping over $50.00, secure online ordering, and of course have high standards when it comes to your privacy. 

So the Calypso is a clit suction and vibrating insertable toy. It’s made of silicone and does come with a USB charging cord so you don’t have to worry about buying extra batteries. This device is water-proof, compatible with water lube, 10 levels of vibration and 7 levels of suctions. There are two buttons on the front of the device. The top one controls the suction and the bottom one controls the vibrator. And the most important thing I was looking for as a Fat Femme was if this was for me and would I recommend it as a pleasure device to others. 

 I want to make sure that as a Fat Femme can enjoy and be easy to work with. I look to see if I can hold the toy in my hand, if I can get to the buttons to control the device easily, is it hard to grip, does it give me pleasure and not complicated. And if there are some problems when it comes to handling the device to make sure there is an easy work around so I can make sure I get what I want and that is pleasure! So here are the pros and cons with the Calypso.

Here are the pros and cons about the Calypso and what I liked about it and didn’t like about it. First off, it was easy to charge up. It took less than an hour to do so for me. It didn’t feel icky like other devices I have used in the past when I used my usual water lube. The vibrating insertable part of the toy was great and surprisingly felt great on a low setting. It didn’t overwhelm me and bring me to orgasm fast. The clit suction was amazing once I got used to it. The effects of how it snuck on me was interesting. It almost felt like I was being teased and I discovered that the higher the suction, the better it felt and stayed on my clit. When it was set on a lower setting, I barely noticed it was there and didn’t stay on my clit. I kept checking to see if it was on it. I also had to ask my husband to check and see if it was in the right place as well.  I was kind of surprised by this because for me normally the higher the setting, the faster I come fast. I did have some problems trying to keep it in place, but discovered a work around it. I used pillows to help me keep it in place. And it also helps if you own a wedge pillow which makes it better to get into a better position to keep it in and enjoy yourself. I was able to get into an angle where the device stayed in place and I could easily reach the buttons to control the suction and the vibrations. This made my experience more pleasurable. 

As far as pleasure concerns, Calypso delivers with some modifications. The insertable vibrator is great and feels good on the G Spot. As far as the suction on your clit, you may need to start high and then slowly down to see what is a good feel for you for getting off. And as I mention, making modifications such as positioning the device, using props such as pillows or a pillow wedge is a must for us Fat Femmes when it comes to our pleasure. Plus I am realizing that my fear of clit suction devices were unfounded and want to try more suction toys. It really felt good once I got in the zone.  And as always, if you use my discount code, MSK2024, you will get a helping hand in purchasing a toy like this. 

#StarshipAmbassador #Self-pleasure #FatFemmePleasure

First Toy review for us Fat Femmes

This post may contain affiliate links. Affiliate links allow Deliciously Perverted to earn commissions on products we recommend. All opinions are our own.

Hi! It’s MsK , your favorite Sex and Body Acceptance Coach from Deliciously Perverted.

Today I want to talk to you about one of my favorite things that I love to try……sex toys, especially with my husband. This particular toy is for external stimulation of the vulva and clit. You can also use this to stimulate the penile frenulum as well. This lovely toy is called Sapphire G and it is from Starship company,http://www.starship.com that is also sponsoring this review. They are a well-known Sex Health and Wellness company which is located in Georgia with 8 locations around the Atlanta area and one location in East Tennessee in East Ridge. They offer discreet packing, free shipping over $50.00, secure online ordering, and of course have high standards when it comes to your privacy. 

So let’s get to the nitty gritty about the Sapphire G. It is a Liquid Silicone Wand toy that comes in a black box. It is about the shape of my hand and it comes with a USB charger so you can make sure it is ready to go when you want to have a little self-pleasure on your own or with your lover. This can be used in and out of water which is a good thing in the shower when you have the house to yourself), 10 different speeds and also made of Silicone. The flat head of this wand is great for clitoral stimulation and for penile frenulum which is located in the front of the penis. 

With any other wands like this, I worried about whether a fat, femme like me would be able to hold it in a comfortable position for more than 5 minutes. I also worried that it may get me off sooner or take too long than I expected to get me off. This has been the case with a few toys in my past which upsets me because I wasted my money and time on something that is hard to maneuver with my hands, takes too long to quickly get me off and if it’s too clunky.  

Well the Sapphire G does not disappoint me at all. It is 6 inches long and takes up to 2 hours to charge. The Sapphire can hold its charge on a low setting 80 minutes on low speed or 50 minutes if you run it on the highest setting. It was easy to charge and I had lots of fun testing it out. I am going to be honest as someone who is going through Perimenopause, I have to be picky about sex toys in general, especially when I use them with water-based lube. So I decided to test this on my hubby first to see what his reaction would be and it be used on those with penises. From his reaction to the Sapphire G I would yes he really liked it. He described it as if a tongue was vibrations going up and down the front of his penis. He didn’t want me to stop using it on him. He especially loved it at higher speeds. We decided this would be a great toy for edging your partner. 

As for me I took things nice and slow while testing this baby out. I discovered it can be a little hard to maneuver at first if you were holding it with the flat part of it up against the vulva and it between my legs. So I turned the wand around and I was to access the button to turn it on and control the speed. This is a bonus if you have carpal tunnel or Arthritis like me.  With a silicone toy you think the grip would be slippery, but it wasn’t. Not even while using my favorite water-based lube on it. Also, with using it in the water, it is easier to use while taking a bath. However, if you are planning to try it in the shower, you may want to make sure you have something to lean on while using it. This will prevent you from slipping in the bathtub.

Overall, I really enjoy testing out The Sapphire G. It fits in the palm of my hand, can change the way you hold the wand to make it easier to use, feels nice, easy grip, great to use with my lube ( especially with water-based since you can not use it with any silicone lube), and you can use it on yourself as well with your penis. So I would definitely recommend this toy, especially for fat femmes out there. So I hope you can give it a try and have a little fun with you. And if you use my discount code, MSK2024, you can get a good discount off your purchase by going to http://www.starship.com. And as always stay safe, keep hydrated, live a delicious life and stay pervy

Why I don’t subscribed to Society’s norm about using the word, Fat and Femme

So People ask me why I use the words Fat and Femme…..well let me explain. I used those terms in a way to describe something and to take back Power! For Example the word, “Fat”. I used it as an adjective to DESCRIBE how I am shaped. The word fat in the past was used to hurt me and to make me feel like shit. Well, I decided to not let it get to me and take back my power who used the word to make me feel less of a human being. “Fat” used to be a trigger word for me and I know it still for folx who are still dealing with the bullshit that comes with words. However, through therapy and some research using mindful mind dumping, I learned that it’s just a word and not to let it have power over me!

And as far as the word, “femme”, I rejected the meaning that makes people feel like shit and what SOCIETY deems the true meaning of what makes a person femme. For me, “femme” means anyone who identifies as female. Whether you are born female, Trans, butch, stud, Or non-binary. And race has nothing to do with being femme either.

This is why I wanted to PROVIDE a space like this so people can learn new tools on how to take care of themselves, give themselves some grace, learn spicy stuff that people feel that “fat” people should not know about, and provide spaces to explore their sensuality. So my workshop on June 1st is one way of PROVIDING something for my community and beyond. Well, I hope this answers folx questions about me and my workshop. You can find out more about the workshop and purchase tickets through this [link]https://forbiddentickets.com/events/msk/f8eaf7ceff

When your self-care looks different from other’s self-care

  Self-care can look different for everyone. For some, it could be a mini-vacation or spa day. Others could be a walk in the park or reading a novel at your favorite spot.  For example,  my husband is cleaning the house and wants to keep it clean. He explained that this keeps his anxiety down and his mental self intact. I know this is a struggle for him since he has been taking on more as the provider in our household. This brings him peace and insight into what he needs to care for around the house and himself. It also means taking my meds and getting the rest I need, especially on bad pain days in which I can not do a lot of housework. This past week with the change in weather and doing a lot of driving for my side gig, which doesn’t help, I felt like shit when I woke up that next day. I didn’t have a lot of energy and realized I should have slept in. When I mentioned this, my husband told me to return to bed. I said I couldn’t because I had a lot of things to work on and around the house. His reply to what I said is something I haven’t heard from him; you can be lazy and still productive. If your body is tired, rest and my to-do list can wait. He also added that I can’t be productive either if I am tired and don’t take care of myself. So I took my ass back to bed and slept for another 4 to 5 hours. I woke up and found his text saying that lunch was in the fridge, and he was out with kiddo at the park. This reminds us that we need some self-care and make time for it, or else we can’t be there for our family and friends.

      Self-care is whatever makes you happy and comfortable. It is the energy you can put into taking care of yourself. It makes you feel recharged and able to do what you need to do. It can be as simple as paying bills or taking a long bath with your favorite bubble bath or bath bomb. Dancing in your living room to a song from your teens or a kid show your kids watch. (Don’t judge me; Yo Gabba Gabba was a bomb to watch when my daughter was younger.). It can be as simple as making a small breakfast so you will not feel bad later in the day. Each of these things can bring you joy and that you are taking care of yourself. If it does not have to be expensive, outlandish, or doesn’t satisfy your soul. You are more than that.

      So please take time for self-care and remind your loved ones to do the same. Again it doesn’t have to be what you see on TV or what you see your favorite artist or actor doing as a method of self-care. Self-care is all about you. So take care of yourself and then take care of the rest.

And a reminder that I hope you live a delicious life of love, new adventures and that I am proud of you!

P.S. I would love to hear what you do for yourself as a form of self-care or what you want to try. I can’t wait to see what you have to say!

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